I was watching a Ted talk yesterday from Mathieu Ricard (who is a French writer and Buddhist monk) and was reminded (in case I needed to!) that happiness was an inside job. His advice is to go inside (for instance by meditating) and concentrate on positive feelings like gratitude, compassion and love, which are the antidote feelings for anger, hatred etc. He was also saying that happiness should not depend on how much (stuff, money etc.) you have, but should be a state of being instead.
So I had to think about own quest for happiness and those last 2-3 years since I came back to the South of France. I am no Buddhist monk and not an intense meditator either (although I do meditate, alone and in a group), but I completely resonated with what he said. I feel that I now have a stable core, and that, although I can still be suddenly thrown out of balance by an external event, but at least I know it won’t last very long before I am my normal self again.
Here are my conclusions on what helped me, let me know if it’s the same for you!
- I tried to make the most of what I had, and be grateful for it. Even though I put it aside for a while as a journaling habit, writing down everyday a few things I was grateful for helped me a lot. To realize how much we already have and how blessed we are. And that it’s not about how much money is there.
- I consciously thought of self-care, even if I am not the best example in that area, I know how important it is!
- I gathered my tribe, and it is still expanding. It is so important to be with like-minded people, and people who will lift you up. (It also means letting go of relationships that do not serve you anymore…). My friends are all very different and I am grateful for each one of them to be who they are and for our relationship!
- I follow my heart whenever possible. It might not always seem logical to others, but I am following my desires and adjusting my course when needed.
- I accept people and events as they are. If I don’t get what I want immediately, there must be a reason, and it means I will get something even better. People are the way they are, I don’t try to change them, it’s either accepting them as they are or letting them go.
I wish you a wonderful week!
Much love, Madeleine